am i asking for too much again...

im gonna be flying 8 days straight in a row with minimum rest for all these days. i just came back from amman last nite and tonite im gonna do mashad (iran). the best part is im gonna be back on tmr morning 6am in the morning.. and 5pm in the evening im leaving for another flight back to sg!!! im so afraid that they might take me off the sg block, cos if there is a delay... i cant get my minimum rest back here in base.

i called rc, wanted to tell him how pack my roster is, and when he answered he said he's bz will call me back later. okie, fine, bz as usual again. so i said call me see if u can get me, cos i have no idea what time he's gonna be calling me, since i have to fly later. 5 mins later he called back, i so wanted to tell him i miss him and really hate to see if i cant go back, instead i had a scolding... saying y do i have to say all those on the phone just now when he tells me he bz and will call me back... firstly, i have no idea he is driving, he din tell me. secondly, how am i to know what time he's gonna call me back....

okie, nvm that... also i mentioned that im gonna be flying 8 days in a row... and gonna be very tired. even now im very tired... and he says since im complaining i should just resign... im like... excuse me.... i just wanted some encouragement from u. is that too much??? just wanna hear that, u can do it, try to rest more etc... but NO!!!! all i get is negative remarks!!! im fed up with all these all the time. im a gal too... leaving far away from home. dun i get some encouraging words some time.......

please can someone tell me, am i asking for too much here???? m i doing this wrongly? i shouldnt seek any nice hearing words from my own bf? im so tired so very tired...time and time again, i get all these scolding nonsense from him. he made me cried... i felt so hurt... i even told him becos of tonite flight i might not even go home if there is a long delay...

all he can say is, is your job... just accept it. m i gonna accept all sorts of craps all the time? cant a woman stand up for herself at times? sometimes i really question myself... is he the one for me? i hate it when he keeps comparing me with his other female friends. saying y cant i be more mature like her or... etc... im just being me... and the best part is oh... i will love u for who u are... is that just a lie?

anyway, i really do hope we can work out, cos i love him very much... alright got to go now. take care guys, please pray that i can go back tmr... i really wanna go home...